What Kind Of Engineering Is This?

So there I was perusing autotrader.com as I contemplate my next car given that one of my current ones has nearly 200k miles on it. Generally speaking, I call quits at 200k. So having had a 1987 6 series, I looked at the new(er) model 645ci's for sale. They have dropped in price quite a bit (hello depreciation). Also that model is the only one you can get a manual transmission with (the current lineup doesn't have a manual unless you get the M model. No thanks). So having lined up an interesting model, I went and did the due diligence: Google Search: known issues with 2005 BMW 645ci

And the above is partially what I found.

Wow.

Apparently the engineers at BMW who designed this engine decided that to get coolant to the engine they would put a pipe from the front of the engine where the water pump is, to the back of the engine. Of course this pipe isn't a part of the aluminum block. No it's connected at both ends by a rubber seal.

Seriously. And it gets worse.

At the back of the engine is a cover that directs the coolant to the two banks of the engine. This too is connected via a gasket.

Do you know what it takes to replace the back cover? Removing the tranny and the exhaust.

Seriously.

Do you know how much that costs at the dealer? About 2 grand. But that's not all.

Do you know that the pipe they fitted is KNOWN to leak at the rubber seals. Do you know that this is expected at about 89k and can happen at 40k or so.

Seriously.

You know how much the dealer wants to charge to replace that with another failure prone part?

$5000 - $9000.

You read right.

However did that get past the management? I've read that a sales person told one owner that "well the car was 80K new so you should expect high repair costs."

Sir. There are high repair costs and there is a total engineering fail. The cooling system design is the latter.

Now I'm a diy person so I don't scare easy on old cars. Valve cover gaskets are cake to me. I've done 'em at least 8 times already. I've done a power steering rack. I've done motor mounts, Alternators, and the like. If I have the tools, agreeable weather and can do the job safely, I'll do it myself. But the online PDF I saw to replace that pipe ran nearly 30 pages with photos. The amount of stuff you have to remove just to get at the valve covers shocked the hell out of me.

I think that the management at BMW said to themselves one or both of the following:

1) Well we stuck these fools for $80k+ when the car is new so these suckers can pay us nearly $11k to pay for our design flaws.

or

2) Well the original owner paid us nicely. We can make more loot when this car hits the second hand market and these poor buyers get stuck with these cars they invested in and have to pay for repairs (hopefully coming to us, but we'll take the money for the parts).

So this is my PSA for those of you out there looking at any V8 BMW from 2004-2010. If the pipe has not been replaced recently (preferably with one of those aftermarket ones I've seen) AND the alternator cover (whatever that is) gasket hasn't been done, along with both valve cover gaskets, do NOT purchase the vehicle unless you are willing to do the job yourself. You are going to get hit with a rather large repair bill because these are labour intensive jobs.

PS While I'm at it, can we do away with these engine covers? Unless they are helping airflow around the motor or helping dissipate heat there is no reason for them and they're just another thing that has to be removed and re-installed when work has to be done.